Oh, the EGO.
When I sit and ponder about the EGO, usually two things immediately occur, I feel powerLESS and my heartbeat starts to pitter-patter in a way that feels constricted: palms get sweaty. Ego, for me, has always meant power OVER, it is tied to my inability to handle change, and it usually prohibits me from shifting to accommodate risk: my EGO is ruled by F E A R. My ego is always telling me that I am not good enough, that I don't have any gifts to offer, that I'm not flexible enough, my schedule isn't full enough: enough, ENOUGH, E N O U G H [see the running theme in my language there]. The beauty of spending seven weeks with a group of super inspiring women, is that we have all come to warp the definition of Ego into something we feel controlled by instead of something to be supremely supported by.
So it was beautiful to be able to explore a new understanding of this big "scary" word and reclaim it as our own. On our weekly call, we were able to really explore the power of honoring our EGO. Of gifting it space to breathe, to speak to us, and to try on defining it from a place of personal power and sink into our own sense of C O N F I D A N C E. From this powerful place, we can truly come to understand our gifts, our contributions, and our unique path in this world.
So "Long live the Ego". Reclaim your power to declare your "HELL YES" and "HELL NO". The power is always available to you, because it is a part of you.
Week Three: CREATE
Week three examines the Ego through our third chakra: the manipura chakra. The seat of our personal power. This week is all about CREATION. At first the word create seemed big, overwhelming, and out of reach. I consider myself a creative person, but most of the time don't acknowledge how creation shows up for me, or me for it. I've now come to understand create as the ultimate tool of empowerment. We are all born to create. It's innate, it's just that the specific expression is different for everyone.
For me: I create a big, beautiful, uniquely, distinctly mine, life. I create sequences for my students to explore using their bodies as an instrument: I play that instrument to tap into my internal stillness. I co-create our home. I create trips and experiences for myself, my family, and my friends. I create a space of coziness in everything I do. I create embrace. I create my goals. I create my dreams. I create vision boards. I create paths to abundance. I create words on the page. I create in seeing what others do not see. I create boundaries to best serve my truth. I create choice to move forward.
C R E A T I O N doesn't have to look like paint on a canvas, words on the page, or grand scaled pieces of art. You are actively creating your experience, moment-to-moment. You are the artist of your life, your past/present/future. You are an expression of the universe in ecstatic motion.
How do you CREATE?
Week Four: LOVE
This was probably the most difficult week of the entire course. LOVE. I feel this so deeply. I know that love is what propels me through the world. I truly believe that my purpose on this earth is to love and be loved [cue Elton John]. But really, I do. So why the screeching brakes at the mention of a whole week devoted to exploring our relationship with love. Well, love for me, is usually about outward expression. It's a light I try to shine on everyone and everything. Yes, that's a lofty life purpose, and it's always a work in progress, but I operate most authentically from this sacred mission. But, this week, was all about SELF-LOVE. Cue the screeching tires and the inevitable car crash. I know, dramatic, but true for me. That familiar voice that quietly whispers about selfishness and deservedness creeped in. That familiar and tired voice inadvertently gave me the strength I needed to forged ahead into unfamiliar territory.
So in week four, we are asked to write a love letter to ourselves. I avoided this assignment like the plague. I put a list of excuses on a piece of paper and in my calendar to confirm that yes, I was in fact, too busy to write that letter. It almost worked, but on the day before our weekly call, I was stranded at a coffee shop for an hour and this assignment was burning a hole in my backpack. So...ok....fine...I guess I'll write it.
If you haven't ever sat down to tell yourself how much you LOVE yourself, please stop what you are doing and write one. It will literally change everything.
Here is mine, even though it feels deeply personal to me, I hope it helps you write one to YOU.
Hey you. I love you because....
"You are vulnerable and brave and always trying. I love you because you show up, you see others, you make space for other people to be themselves. I love you for being in love with your family; for supporting, nurturing, and acknowledging them for your entire life. I love you for trusting; especially with Thom; for loving deeply and unabashedly with abandon. I love you for speaking up and changing [not recklessly, but thoughtfully] your life, always. It's even getting easier. In this moment with Thom; you allow him access to his fears and yours too. This renewed and deep intimacy flows from that deeply re-filled well. I love you for being in the pursuit of self-knowledge and for knowing and embracing your imperfections. I love you for being in conversation with your truth. I love you for being brave enough to leave when it doesn't serve your soul. I love you for being honest with your ever-evolving relationship with your yoga practice. I love you for being courageous enough to offer yourself as a teacher to a community you seek to serve. I love you for honoring where you are at and for taking your methodical time [even though it's doesn't always make sense to others]. I love you for your compassion and the way you are always seeking to better understand & show up deeper for others. I love you, sweet girl, exactly where you are in this moment. I love you without judgement or boundaries. I love you for your innate expression, your willingness to be broken. I love you because there is literally no one on the planet like you. I love you, I love you, I love you because you need to hear it, again...and again....and again."
Want to dig deeper into this work with an entire tribe of radical humans? Join Mary Beth LaRue and Jacki Carr in their 7 Weeks to Bliss (click to register) online program beginning September 11th, 2017.
P.S. use promo code: "jennybliss" for 10% off your registration